Ikea quality my ass!

 

 

Just in case anyone told you otherwise, I wanted to let you know that owning your own dot com definitely has its benefits. You want proof? Fine. Exactly one day after the successful launch of www.tommyv2.com a rabid fan and I OWNED my Ikea bed. Normally I'd say "Fuck! What a fucking BK!" but not this time. At this point, it's more of a pat on the back than anything else.

A visual recreation of tonight's event:


No comments about my flower-print bed sheets necessary
 

Check out the collateral damage: Ikea quality my ass...


 

Okay, so we broke the fucking bed. But look carefully. Look where the lattice frame broke...where my fucking head was. My giant inflated head apparently weighed more than me and a girl. Is my ego really that huge? Let me say it before you get a chance: I FUCKING RULE. As if things couldn't get any better, I also found a loonie and toonie under my bed. It's like getting paid to have sex - and you can't go wrong with that.
 

Bullshit. Can't even take Tommy doing a v2 upgrade on a girl. Boycott! No rude comment about Russia is necessary.

 

What more can I say? Oh wait, I know: I'm fucking awesome.